I haven’t blogged in ten days. I even missed my blog’s first birthday. (Sorry, blog). Why, you ask? Procrastination… the very problem that has held the development of flying cars back for multiple decades. Ironically, it also led to the development of Angry Birds, which again has held the development of flying cars back for multiple […] Read more…
Confessions
Junior Has Learned to Crawl (and I Can’t Handle it)
I put Junior of the floor to sit down. He was quietly playing on the floor until I stood up and walked away. My little 8-month old money vacuum (kid), then pushed up on his arms and knees, and put one hand in front of the other. He moved three whole feet in my direction. […] Read more…
The Cutest Butt In The World
…belongs to this guy. No one told me being a mom would turn me into a tushie-lover. Read more…
Pedicures are Dumb. And I Love Them
What a great business model. Massage someone’s feet, throw some paint on the toes, charge $35 before tip. Get Money. Why do millions of women spend millions of dollars to decorate such an insignificant part of their body. It’s not like I look at my feet all day. “But wait, JD, why don’t you just […] Read more…
A Letter to Baby Weight
Why the f**k are you still here?! Honestly, it’s been 6 months. I think it’s time for you to go. Seriously. 42. No, not Jackie Robinson’s number (or Mariano Rivera) No, not 101010 in binary code No, not any reference to Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy 42 is the number of pounds I gained when […] Read more…