I always believed that the topics couples fight most about are: Money, Sex, Kids, and Chores. Of these, chores seem the most trivial but man, can there be some epic battle-royales over who does dishes.
When a couple decides to cohabitate, married or not, you envision the …ikea ad… if you will. A neat, well-decorated home, with a family cuddling on the couch, snacks displayed deliciously, and the dog snuggled on the rug. Then you make the trip to the store to buy things for the home: kitchen utensils, home decor, groceries, etc. You’re probably holding hands and making jokes during the process. Quite a magical bonding time for a couple.
If you hadn’t divided up the chores before you moved in, brace yourself. Before you know it, The hamper is full, the dryer is full, the dishwasher is full, the kitchen sink is full, the trash is full, and the refrigerator is empty.
Well whose fault was that?
What some couples don’t realize is that your boyfriend/husband/significant other is not only your partner but now your roommate. Would you let your roommate get away with some of the stuff your bf/hubby/s.o. does? Sure, you bite your tongue the first few times, but you know it’s gnawing at you. “Keep the peace” right? Well then all of his little “quirks” start to add up, and one day, you can’t take it anymore, and now it’s a fight.
The silver lining is that this kind of fight that can easily be avoided.
duh, get a maid.
Haha… clearly, I jest. As with any new arrangement, trying setting the ground rules beforehand. In fact, write them down. Who does what, when, and how often?
When it comes to chores, nip any dispute in the bud. Keep the division of chores as fair as possible with regards to each other’s schedule. This doesn’t mean that one can’t help the other out every once in a while. It’ll be much appreciated in fact. the key takeaway really is communication. If you can’t even talk about chores, don’t even bother with money, kids, and all the other nuances of cohabitation.
In my home, we both work full-time. As far as chores, I cook, he does dishes. I do laundry, he does yard work. I take care of groceries and household items. He takes care of the vehicles. We also have established who cleans what room. In any situation, success can easily be attained if expectations are managed.
Kids and pets are a different warzone reserved for another post.
How do you guys divide up the chores?